Do you ever wish you could see inside your child’s mind? For a parent trying to fathom out your child’s reasoning, it is a never ending task. It’s made harder because at a young age, a child doesn’t have the verbal skills to enunciate their feelings. Want a peek into the way your child might see the world?
1. Bed Time is Horrible
You put your child to bed and think you are doing something in the child’s interest, but your child sees things in a very different light. What your child hears is, “Go lie down…in the dark…alone…for hours.” For you, bedtime is something to look forward to. It is something you miss when you are at work, and feels at its best around 10 minutes before your alarm clock goes off. For your child it is a time to be away from his or her parents for hours. It is a time to be stuck in a room alone. It is a time to be plunged into darkness for a never-ending period of time. It may also be a time to wake up and wonder why everything has changed from the magical dreamland to a dark bedroom.
2. I Give Away the Money and He Gives Me More Back
Teach kids how to spend money when they are young. You give them a little money for the ice cream man, and he gives the child some change. But, the ice cream man gives back more coins than he was originally given. The child now thinks he or she has more money and insists on the purchase of more ice creams.
3. I Had It Yesterday so Why Can’t I Have It Today
All that happens and all that matters will happen to your child. This is one of the ways your child sees the world. There is no world outside the micro-world your child lives in. For example, a small child may learn to deceive his or her parents by waiting until they leave the room, but cannot yet understand how sounds work and how they may reach another room. Your child is in his or her own little bubble, and as your child gets older that bubble becomes a little bigger. Your child gets older and starts to realize that the world doesn’t revolve around them, but for some it takes up to 22 years to figure this out. If your child had something yesterday, he or she may not understand why he or she cannot have the same thing today.
4. It’s All Gone Now and I Can’t Remember Where
Ever have your child cry because he or she wants something that they have already eaten. Cannot understand why your child is angry or upset right after eating? It is because your child has forgotten he or she has eaten. In the eyes of your child, the thing that was there and delicious is now gone. In your child’s eyes it has been stolen because the memory of eating it has dropped from his or her mind.
5. I Am Supposed to Copy You on Some Things but Not Others
This is a big one that a lot of parents do not understand. Your child has instincts and one of them is to copy the people (and animals) that they are surrounded by. We keep this instinct right up to the day we die, which is why we operate so well in herds, why we are so easily influenced by the actions of others, and why things such as mirroring happens with body language when people talk. Your child cannot understand how and why he or she is driven to copy you, and he or she certainly cannot understand why he or she should copy you on some things and not others. When dealing with your child you really have to act in the way you want your child to act. Your child, especially at a young age, will soak up every bad habit you have and every negative thing you do and copy it either now or in the future.
6. This Rule is a Certain Rule and is Unbreakable…wait a Minute!
Your child will break rules if you show him or her that rules may be broken. Still, every child starts out with the belief that rules are unbreakable until they have the revelation that they are not. A child will take a lot at face value until you give them reason to suspect.
7. You Can Read My Mind, so Why Aren’t You Doing It
Put yourself in your child’s shoes. You cannot communicate properly and cannot get your needs and wants over to the people that you depend on. It is a horrible problem if you apply it to your adult self, but your child is not concerned with such problems because your young child believes you can read his or her mind. Even past the age of four, your child may think you can read his or her mind. Frustration and tantrums will follow if the child thinks you are ignoring the needs and signals he or she is so “obviously” sending out.
You can see why child psychology is such a fascinating subject and why being a parent is the hardest job in the world. Makes you think, huh?