As a mother in the trenches of parenting teenagers, I feel I have learned some valuable wisdom in the ways of dealing with teenage attitude. I don’t think there is a perfect way to do this. It is a moment by moment, situation by situation thing where you just do your best. But I do hope my years of parenting teenagers can offer you some help in the best ways of dealing with teenage attitude.
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Smile and Speak in a Pleasant Tone of Voice
One of the best ways of dealing with teenage attitude is to smile and speak in a pleasant tone of voice. They want to get a rise out of you. You getting angry is the response they are going for. Not giving them that is a point for you and can nip that attitude in the bud. This doesn’t always work but is a great first effort.
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Turn It Back on Them
There are times when giving your teen the attitude back can work. You aren’t stooping to their level of maturity but rather, showing them what they sound like in an attempt to get them to knock it off. The shock of hearing what they sound like can embarrass them, motivating them to stop. This also is something parents can usually find humor in doing. That’s always good because it lightens the mood.
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Cut the Internet
It is absolutely amazing how quickly this works. When your teen starts giving you attitude, calmly warn them their internet access is about to go. This will usually do the trick. But if they continue to pour their attitude on all those near, follow through. Unplug them for a couple of days or so. Their attitude usually magically improves when they realize they could stay unplugged if it doesn’t change.
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Try a do-over
We all have a bad day now and then, right? Sometimes that may be the situation with your teen. It is good to give them a little grace when this happens. Tell them they get a do-over and start the conversation again. This is their chance to chill before things get heated.
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Laugh
Really, sometimes you just need to laugh at your teen. Not in an unkind way, of course. But allowing yourself to see the humor in how upset your teen may be over something minor can help you not to get bent out of shape. Realize the humor when you see it. It can help you through the day and laughing sure beats crying.
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Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.
Rephrase It
Sometimes when one of my teens is upset, I will take a moment and rephrase the issue for them. You are stating what they are really upset about without attitude. This can catch them off guard and stop the attitude. It can also calm them to realize they are being heard and that you are willing to help them deal with their issue. This gives you both a happy ending.
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Realize It Will Pass
You know, teenagers are teenagers. There are going to be some rocky moments. Being a teenager isn’t easy, especially in our modern world. Their hormones are crazy and life can feel overwhelming. Sometimes the best thing a parent can do is realize this will pass. This can give you perspective.
Now it’s your turn. Share your secrets with me. How do you deal with teenage attitude in your house?
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