7 Sure Ways to Spot Bad Parenting ...

7 Sure Ways to Spot Bad Parenting ...
By Michelle • Aug 30, 2021

While I'm sure every preceding generation says this about the next, poor parenting choices seem to be a major problem today, and there are so many ways to spot bad parenting! From outright physical abuse to more subtle (but just as harmful) lapses of parenting, who hasn't been tempted to step in once in a while? I've felt the need to tactfully step in a few times recently, so I thought I'd share a few of the ways to spot bad parenting, so you're aware, too.

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1. Neglect

I know that one of the first ways to spot bad parenting is if the parent is completely ignoring the child, and not meeting their basic needs. If the parent does not care about the child enough to pay attention to them, then they are neglecting their child. Parents need to nurture and spend time with their children in order for them to grow up as social people, so if you suspect there's neglect going on, consider stepping in.

2. Over-Protection

This is the other extreme, the opposite of neglect. You shouldn’t ignore your children, but you shouldn’t be over-protective either. If people are over-protective of their children, eventually when they become teenagers they will rebel and possibly damage themselves in the process just because it is against their parent’s will. Of course, some of this rebellion is part of the natural teen experience, but still and all, by over-protecting a child, you're doing them something of a disservice.

3. Emotional Abuse

Many people think that emotional abuse is not as serious as physical abuse, but the truth is that emotional abuse can be far worse than physical in some ways. Emotional abuse can last a lifetime because it lingers in a person’s mind. Emotional abuse can consist of manipulation, lying to, and insulting the child. Again, if you see this, please consider stepping in.

4. Physical Abuse

If you see someone hitting their child, pulling their hair, shoving them, or any other rough movements, there is a great chance that physical abuse is going on. If you see abuse going on then you should point it out, and get help for the child. Nobody deserves to be abused, and sometimes, to stop it, an adult just needs to step forward.

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5. No Discipline

This is kind of the same thing as ignoring a child. If you don’t acknowledge when your child is doing something wrong, they will never learn the appropriate behavior for society. However discipline does not mean abuse. Parents should pull a child aside and explain what their child is doing wrong, and what the appropriate behavior is. This is much more subtle, and unless you're close to the parents who are doing this, there's no tactful or helpful way to mention this.

6. Favoritism

I have noticed this a lot in my friend’s household. He has siblings, and his mother tends to treat the middle daughter with more respect than the oldest and youngest son. She gets everything she wants, while the other two kids have to sacrifice things that they want for her schedule. This favoritism can damage a child's self-esteem. If you see this in a friend's household, it's not a bad idea to find a tactful way to ask about it; some parents may not realize they're doing it!

7. Spoiling

Just like the daughter who was the favorite, spoiling is a characteristic of bad parenting. Giving a child anything they want whenever they want it makes them spoiled. They will become uncontrollable and when they get older, they will be horrible to live with and deal with for anyone who is around. It's hard on the child, too... they won't understand why, in real life, they're not given everything they want at the asking. This is another difficult subject to broach, but again, the parents may not realize they're doing it, and might appreciate some gentle advice.

Bad parenting is becoming more of an issue lately, isn't it? If you see signs of abuse, step in and say something. It may be hard, but a parent who is abusing their child needs to be stopped, and the child will be thankful that you stepped in. What are some other things that you consider bad parenting?

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Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

  • Ssarattuulia

    2014-03-17T17:01:59.831Z

    This is so true!!!
  • Breess

    2014-03-17T10:32:25.964Z

    I like the though behind creating this article, but it comes off as very biased... Like it's written by a teenager who's mad at her parents.
  • Shawna

    2014-11-05T00:33:46.235Z

    Unbelievable! No parent would have the hubris to write an article about how to spot bad parenting. The author's credits include being a college student and writing other lists such as "7 ways to tell your parents you're moving out." My reaction to this article was actually a lot less polite so I'll keep my initial judgement to myself, and recommend the author do the same in the future. There's plenty of judgment for parents from other parents already, and the last thing they need is for some kid whose biggest life concerns don't involve the well-being of her own children to weigh in.
  • Ashley

    2014-03-17T13:17:59.458Z

    I don't think you should call someone a "bad" parent unless there's actual abuse.
  • Rachel

    2014-03-17T11:04:34.675Z

    i completely agree with this article. very very true. i experienced most of these as a child except the spoiled part. haha. but my best friend was spoiled growing up and she definitely had an entitlement attitude until she got to be in the real world and realized it wasn't all about her..not thay she was a bad persin or anything because she's a beautiful soul and one of the kindest people i know. with a great outlook on life..but most kids that are spoiled aren't quite as easy going
  • mimi

    2014-05-29T17:47:15.772Z

    Really? Call the cops if you see abuse, dont intervene unless you are prepared for potential threatening behavior, furthermore the rest of this article is nonsense, bunch of amateur psychologists running around judging others...
  • Marria

    2014-03-17T16:53:46.985Z

    The word choice this article uses is completely unprofessional. You have zero background to be stating this things. Spoiling a child will not necessary make them hard to live with for everyone who is around them. In fact, spoiling a child (and by this term I believe you mean by purchasing everything they want) will not teach a child the basic ways of life. Spoiling a child with love and affection is an amazing thing. Spoiling a child by going out and doing family activities together often is not a bad thing even if it is spending money on them because the quality time they receive out of it is amazing. If you are to "buy their love" in that you buy them things to make up for poor parenting, that could be detrimental to their emotional growth and you will not be someone who the child can come to help with their emotional regulation.
  • Amy

    2014-04-28T23:41:08.161Z

    Seriously? Who are you to judge bad parenting? I have worked with parents fighting their way out of generations of poverty and abuse. What are they fighting for? Their children. Do they parent like you or me? No, but who taught them? But, I do know what keeps them down. The judgement of people who don't understand that they are doing the very best they can with the skills they have. Offer a hand without judgement and see what you get. (I do realize that in far too many cases the as use is beyond help.)
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