There are so many varied opinions on the pros and cons of postponing parenthood and since I'm a relatively young mother, I've heard them all! I think that knowing the reasons behind having a child at a certain time isn't quite as critical as being personally ready and ready as a couple. It's one of the most impactful decisions you'll make as an adult- parenthood is difficult, messy and the most rewarding experience of your life. So, here are some pros and cons of postponing parenthood that just might help you process when you'll be ready for children!
One positive aspect within this list of pros and cons of postponing parenthood is that waiting generally means greater financial security. People's careers generally peak between 30-40, which means promotions, raises and the ability to acquire savings and reach future goals. Of course, it's also true for 20 somethings who are frugal and save for their future endeavors. But generally speaking, one pro of waiting to become a parent is financial security and stability in just living life for a longer amount of time!
I've found that being a parent requires A LOT of energy. Right from the beginning there's a constant need for your attention, love, care and support, which is a good thing! However, it's incredibly draining to be mindful of your children 24/7. While you're young, you're more capable of handling stress and maintaining energy levels. Part of the aging process is decreased health and agility, which makes postponing parenthood more difficult.
Once you've hit 30-35, it's safe to assume you've established your career and are steadily moving forward with it. While you can't rely on your career's success, as some things are out of your control, it is good to plan and be smart about where your life is headed!
The process of pregnancy, childbirth and then life as a mom takes a toll on the body. Your body will never be the same after giving birth, regardless of age. However, having a child in your 20s is dramatically easier on your body than your 30s. You recover faster, lose the baby weight sooner, and have greater chances of having the same size hips post pregnancy. It also makes the pains of delivery smoother when you're body is more equipped to handle such a task. Most importantly, being physically fit is key for a quicker recovery and sustained energy levels!
I think it's vital for any couple to have quality time with each other before committing to parenthood. You need to know each other well and have an established way of how you will co-raise your children. You should have an idea of how you will discipline and what beliefs and values you will teach your kids as they grow. Plus, you'll want some quality alone time to just enjoy each other before another life enters the picture!
If you postpone becoming a parent, just remember that the longer you wait, the older you will be when they eventually spread their wings and leave your home. No one wants to think about that, especially when you're just starting out as a parent. However, it's something to keep in mind, especially if you have plans to travel and relocate once your home is empty.
One pro of postponing parenthood that I'm faced with quite often is the ability to stay out late and just have no agenda. By postponing parenthood, you're able to enjoy your younger years- not by necessarily partying, but rather having no time constraints like bed time and early weekend mornings. Kids don't know the definition of sleeping in, so keep that in mind!
Whatever time you choose to have children, remember that it's yours to make and you'll know when it's the right time! Don't let others persuade you one way or the other because frankly, what works for them might not work for you. Myself and readers alike would love to hear your priorities for becoming a parent and reasons to wait or not!
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