7 Ways to Deal with the Prejudice against Working Moms ...

Alicia

7 Ways to Deal with the Prejudice against Working Moms ...
7 Ways to Deal with the Prejudice against Working Moms ...

Sadly, there are still some people who hold onto prejudice against working moms. This is hurtful and unkind. I know because I have seen it and felt it myself. I have the advantage in understanding this situation because I have been both a working mom and a stay at home mom. I want to help you find some strategies to deal with prejudice against working moms.

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1

Let It Go

One of the very easiest and simplest ways to deal with prejudice against working moms is to let it go. You do not owe anyone an explanation for your choices. Only you can make the decision about what is best for your family. No one else is qualified to make that choice. Therefore, they are not qualified to criticize it. If a remark is directed toward you, simply smile and let it go over your head.

2

Reassure Yourself

Don’t let others get to you with their opinions. If you know you are doing what is best for your family then remind yourself of that fact. Be confident in your decision and let that show to others. This will also deter the comments from coming your way. They may think it but they will be less likely to say it when you are confident.

3

Be a United Front

Don’t allow prejudice to get you down. Sometimes you may need to be a united front when others direct that prejudice toward you. This may be especially true with family members. Generally, if a family member knows that a couple is in agreement over a subject, they are less likely to attack them over any given subject. Try this and see for yourself.

4

Be Verbal about How This is Best for Your Child

If someone begins to put you down and give an opinion about why you being a working mom is bad for your child, it is wise to be ready with a rebuttal. You can explain, if you wish, all the ways that you know that being a working mom is better for your child. You might say that you want to be able to give your child more or that you want to save for their college education. You might state that this is a way that allows your mom or another family member time to bond with your child, if that is the case. It’s okay to say that what you are doing is best for your child.

5

Offer and Demand Respect

It is good to both offer and demand respect. Sometimes the biggest prejudice against working moms comes from stay at home moms. They feel so strongly about their choice that they can be quite vehement in their opinions. Sometimes letting them know that you respect the choice they have made is the best thing to do. It disarms their prejudice and sometimes gains you respect in return.

Famous Quotes

Men in general judge more from appearances than from reality. All men have eyes, but few have the gift of penetration.

Niccolò Machiavelli
6

Avoid Confrontation

One of the best ways to avoid confrontation when you deal with prejudice is to refuse to participate. Remember, you don’t have to participate in every argument you are invited to. You can simply state your opinion but don’t go into conflict over it. If the person tries to get you to engage, tell them you have nothing else to say.

7

Let Time Tell the Story

You know, time has a funny way of defending us. It can show that you made good choices. With time, it will be visibly seen that you loved your child very much. It will also be evident when you have a child that turns out well-mannered and well-behaved that being a working mom was not a bad decision at all. When backed into a corner, you may even want to say that to someone. You know your parenting ability does not hinge on the decision to work or stay at home.

Dealing with prejudice against working moms can be brutal. What is the best way you have found to do this? Please share your secrets.

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

It's a shame that 'women' are the only ones who ever comment on this subject. We should be supporting our choices no matter what as no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. I have 2 boys and with my first I was ready to return to work and eventually did when he was 15 months old. I never felt guilty but I did face snide comments from other women over the years. With my 2nd I was fortunate enough to start my own business and work from home part time. I'm a single mum too. We have less money now but I enjoy my time with my boys aged 17 and 4. I've done both and can see both benefits. I'm sure no one would work if they didn't have to.

How about we start supporting each other as mothers- wether we work or not? You say "i dont mean to put you down" but yet both sides make snarky little comments towards each other. Motherhood is something to embrace not defend.

I would never let a man take care of me ever! I was 19 when I saw all these " stay at home moms" on Oprah who one day husbands left them after years and years of marriage . They were crying saying they didn't know how to balance a check book, pay the bills because the husband always took care of things like that. Didn't have any skills because though they did go to college and got there degrees they had never worked. They got married stayed home baked cookies, did the wash and took the kids to school. I enjoyed my time at home when I had my daughter those first three months went by so fast. I was fortunate in that she went to my mothers house and not into a daycare. But I've worked since I was 15 I enjoy being a contributor in my house hold. I don't put stay at home moms down but it's not for me.

I never experienced guilt being a working mom. I grew up in a house with a working mom (she became a widow at 26 with 2 kids), and my son has grown up with a working mom (I became a widow at 30 with 1 kid). Things happen in life - so I was a working well before my husband was killed by a drunk driver. It was devastating losing him, but it wasn't catastrophic (financially). Working moms are nothing to be ashamed of!

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