If you are messing around, or planning to have kids you better know what you are doing. Having just one baby can send you into economic turmoil. That is not to say, never have kids. But, it is to say, you better know what the heck you are getting into.
You have probably seen those talk shows like “Jerry Springer” and “Dr. Phil” over the years featuring some 13-year-old, screaming she wants to have a baby and won’t let anything stop her! Sometimes it’s two or three on one show! They bring in doctors, sociologists, and even drill sergeants to talk some sense into them… but it never seems to work. Oh, to be young!
But, what about when you are 16, a late teen, young adult, or a little older? You’re knockin’ boots on the regular. You know, doin’ the nasty! You get a little careless… “He said he was gonna pull out… I thought my period was coming,” you say. And, then there is also the breaking of condoms… sometimes on purpose!
Then there are those super young couples, who just got married… careers barely took root… “Let’s have a baby!” they proclaim. Are you ready for the cost? Babies are expensive, and there is a heavy cost in many other areas.
1. Baby Stuff
Baby showers help, but not when it really gets tough. You need formula, breast pumps, bottles, blankets, and warmers. There are car seats if you can still afford a car! You need baby food, a constant supply of new clothes, diapers, and baby shoes. You need a crib, strollers, rattles, and yes, you should be rattled by now! But, hold your Pampers, we are just getting started!
Daycare is no joke! It is like paying an extra rent in some cases. According to care.com, the average cost at a daycare center is $211 a week. That’s almost a $1000 dollars a month! For a nanny, the average $580 a week! That’s $2,320 a month! The hell with rent, that’s a damn mortgage!
Don’t think you can just get an extra part-time job to pay for it. Why? Well, you will need more daycare while you are at that second job. True, there are family, friends, and a patient husband if you are lucky. But, people’s generosity runs out fast, and I can tell you from experience, a lot of dads don’t know what the hell they are doing! Consider a condom to be an investment!
3. Doctor & Dentist Appointments
We’d like to believe every baby born into the world is perfect. Yeah, just like we are right? Everybody gets sick at some point. Babies are no exception. Things go wrong. Even when things go right, they still need a checkup, to prevent things from going wrong. If you are young or a little up there, healthcare can break even the healthiest family. Don’t have benefits? The government can only help so much. Your parents can only help so much. It is basically left up to you and the father. Not everybody can afford health benefits. What about prescription costs?
Dental can be just as important. I recently took my daughter in for a checkup. I asked the dentist, what is the youngest patient he has had with cavities. He took a deep breath and said, “3-years-old.” He said the toddler had seven cavities from sleeping with the bottle in its mouth as a baby. Things happen, but “things” also cost money.
4. They Start to Grow, so do the Costs
When babies start pushing a certain age, they can’t sleep in the bed with you anymore. I’m not even sure that is safe for a baby, for that matter. They need their own bed or their own bedroom. If your baby can climb out of the crib, it’s time. They also want bigger and more expensive toys as they grow. There are expenses like lunch money, new shoes, and sneakers every six months. They need shorts in the summer and coats in the winter. Which they lose, by the way. It’s so crazy. Adults can buy a jacket for themselves that last five or six years. Kids? Every time you wake them up in the morning they need something new. Let’s not forget groceries. They gotta eat! They need Fruit Loops, milk, juice boxes, toothpaste, soap, and some even need deodorant. There are matching socks, school supplies, Halloween costumes, and birthday theme parties! It never ends!
5. Window of Education
If you had dreams of going to college, or in some cases, graduating high school, having a baby can make your life very complicated. If you do plan to raise your child and go to school, you better gear up for war. It is not for the faint-hearted. On top of everything else, you will likely have to work full time. Many women have pulled it off with help. But, you better be committed. If you are not pregnant yet, consider the cost to your dreams and education. Can it wait? Can sex wait? If you are young, you have your whole life in front of you. Having a baby can be expensive, and it may cost you your education. Does anyone dream about getting on welfare when they grow up?
6. Deadbeat Dads & Moms
It is a good thing to be an optimist, but only a fool would believe life is a fairytale. Things happen and things go wrong. Watch out who you sleep with. The sex might be bangin’ and fun, but if you get pregnant, will he be around when it is not so fun? When fun becomes responsibility? People become deadbeat dads for many reasons. Some are in prison, many are too young, some can’t find a job, some are on drugs, many are lazy, others never loved you or the baby, or they already have too many other babies. Some just don’t give a f**k. Whatever the reason or situation, the financial cost remains. The emotional cost remains as well. Unfortunately, there are also deadbeat moms out there too. As I said, be careful who you sleep with. Ain’t no booty or balls worth that kinda emotional pain or financial destruction.
7. The Time Cost
Babies and kids are cute, but personal time is like gold when you are a new parent. It is extremely time-consuming when you have a baby. You gotta let the club, the drinking and the hanging out go. Sometimes you just want to be alone, but you can’t, cause the baby needs you. The baby is crying and even crying during your favorite show. You have to stay alert at all times, and they need constant supervision. You could get distracted for one second, and disaster strikes. I remember when my daughter was about one-and-a-half … we were in the kitchen, and she was sitting in the high chair. I had my back turned for 10 seconds, and when I turned around she was standing up, ready to jump 5 feet to the floor! Keep in mind she was strapped in! Somehow, she got loose. Thankfully, I grabbed her in time!
8. Cost of Patience
The costs continue. As sweet as kids are, they can push you to your limit in terms of losing your patience. People somehow believe that babies and kids cooperate when you say something. They don’t. When you are in a hurry, they still don’t and don’t care. They cry all night. They wake you up in that “good sleep” asking for a glass of water, only to take half-a-sip. They draw on your walls with permanent markers, spill everything, and wet and dump in their diaper while you’re in the grocery store and more. Kids have meltdowns, and so do parents!
9. Priceless Cost of Trust
Another unspoken cost is the strain of who to trust. My wife and I were lucky that my daughter’s grandparents babysat through her early years. Most people aren’t’ that lucky. I think they loved her more than we did. My daughter certainly loved them more than us lol! What if there isn’t any loving family to watch your baby? Can you trust the local daycare center to watch your baby? Will your precious newborn be neglected or loved? The emotional toll on everybody is more expensive than any diaper or bowl of cheerios could ever be.
10. Love Overcomes Everything
You have just read a lot of terrible things about having kids. I will tell you that having kids, expected or unexpected, changes everything. Sure, it changes everything financially, but you will never love anyone like your own child, believe me. Ok, maybe you love your iPhone, but it’s nothing like the love of a baby and watching them grow. All the poop, to the pomp and circumstance of the prom and graduation, kids are the best. Yeah, they drive you crazy, want candy and chicken nuggets all the time, and eventually a car, but you were the same way. Kids are incredible, and don’t ever forget it. Ok, they’re expensive too! But hey, you were worth it and so are they.
Good luck and make good choices! Whaaah!