There are many pros and cons of being a young mother. The definition of what constitutes a “young mother” has changed somewhat as the average age of mothers has hit 30, and being a young mother in your early twenties can naturally be quite different to being a young mother at sixteen. Many of the blessings and problems are the same though, so here are 9 pros and cons of being a young mother.
You can’t discuss the pros and cons of being a young mother without considering the fact that younger people naturally have higher energy levels. Mothers in their teens and early twenties will probably find it easier to physically cope with sleepless nights and running around after a lively toddler.
As we get older, our skin becomes less supple and everything takes longer to heal. Young skin is able to cope with the stretching better and may be less prone to stretch marks, while any scars will heal better.
The ability of young skin to repair itself more easily is not only beneficial for young mothers, but for their children as well. Not only will young skin heal better, but it is also less prone to scarring, which is especially important for young children who are prone to cuts and scrapes. Additionally, young skin is more elastic, which means that it can stretch more easily without causing stretch marks, which is beneficial for pregnant women.
Although your body will probably be less damaged due to your young skin’s ability to cope better with the stretching, your body will probably never be the same again. This is easier to accept in your thirties when many others your age are yo-yo dieting and dealing with pregnancy stretch marks themselves, but tougher when your friends are all still looking gorgeous in skin-tight mini dresses and tiny bikinis.
Staying in changing nappies and cleaning up sick can be hard when all your friends are out having a good time. If you’re thinking about trying for a baby and considering the advantages and disadvantages of becoming a young mother, this is definitely one thing to consider.
While you might miss out on going out while you’re young, younger mothers will naturally be younger when their children grow up and are ready to move out. While your friends are starting to deal with difficult teenagers, you’ll be regaining your independence.
This newfound freedom can also mean you have more energy to pursue career goals, return to education or simply enjoy your hobbies and interests that were put on hold. While still youthful, you maintain the vigor to redefine your identity outside of motherhood. Embracing this stage can also strengthen your bond with your grown children, as you're closer in age and perhaps, in mindset—ready to explore new experiences alongside them, or even on your own adventurous pursuits.
People are more likely to judge teenage mothers but I’ve faced negative comments about being pregnant at 22, because having a university degree and great career experience so far, I am expected to do “more.” It’s best to just ignore people’s negative comments but some people may find criticism and disapproving looks difficult to deal with.
Society often has set expectations on when and how women should have children, with judgments cutting across various demographics, including age. As a young mother, criticism can range from undermining your capability to raise a child to questioning your decision-making. It's important to stay confident in your choices and seek support where needed, knowing that parenting is a highly personal journey. Remember that people's perceptions are their own and your priority is to provide love and stability for your child. The resilience you build from these experiences can also translate into strength in other areas of your life.
The smaller the age gap between you and your children, the more likely you are to identify with them easily. This could be particularly useful when you’re dealing with a difficult teenager.
Having a smaller age gap can translate into a deeper empathy for the challenges and trends that your teenagers face in their daily lives. As a young mother, you're more likely to remember your own adolescent years vividly, which can help in relating to your teens' experiences, whether it's navigating social dynamics, coping with academic pressures, or dealing with the complexities of online interactions. This understanding can foster open communication and trust, making it easier to guide and support your teenagers through these formative years.
There’s no escaping the fact that you will probably have less money in your youth than if you wait for a few years to have a baby. This should have little impact on your child, provided all their essential needs are seen to, but may make life more difficult for you as a parent.
Financial constraints can often lead to elevated stress levels and a need for careful budgeting. Nonetheless, young parents are usually more adaptable and can find creative solutions to manage with less. It's important to prioritize spending and seek out community resources or family support that may lighten the fiscal load. Remember, while money is vital, the warmth and love you provide for your child cannot be bought, and these are the true riches that contribute to a nurturing environment for your little one.
If you’re considering the pros and cons of being a young mother, you need to think about the impact it could have on your education and career. Many young women drop out of school and university when they find out they are pregnant, and it can be harder to study after having children due to childcare costs. Other people of the same age will also have more work experience.
Did you become a mother at a relatively young age? What pros and cons of being a young mother did you encounter? Do you wish you waited or are you happy with how things have turned out?