Perhaps you’re looking for some tips for avoiding negativity from your parents about a job that you have, or are currently thinking about taking or pursuing. Many parents have certain ideas in their minds for what they’d like their kids to achieve, be, aspire to, etc. Many times, this comes off as a dictatorship that children become defensive toward, which I understand firsthand. Yet, avoiding negativity from your parents completely simply isn’t possible, I’m here to tell you. There is absolutely no way they will ever stop worrying about you, or wanting the best for you. Yet, the good thing is, there are ways you can learn how to deal with it, and avoid it whenever it is possible. By learning how to talk to your parents, handle certain conversations, present yourself, and handle arguments, you’ll understand how you can avoid excess amounts of negativity, and learn to deal with the small amounts that inevitably come. That's where these tips for avoiding negativity from your parents will home in handy.
1. Be Confident
One of the best and first tips for avoiding negativity from their parents is to be confident when speaking about a job, or any situation for that matter. Confidence is different than arrogance, and especially different than being defensive. Being confident is about being calm, yet collected with your thoughts, and not shying away from passions you have about pursuing that job. Don’t just sit there and let your parents talk. Allow them to present their case, and then kindly but boldly tell them how much the job means to you, what you know about it, what your plans are, and why you feel you’ll succeed. Confidence exudes success, and even if they don’t act like they accept it, it will make a huge impression on them in the long run.
2. Know Your Facts
One thing parents like to do is teach their kids things, especially about jobs, employment, and their experience with the issue. This being said, if there’s anything you don’t know about the job you want, or that you’re not sure of, be sure you know about it before you talk to your parents about it. Otherwise, they’ll be all too happy to show you what you don’t know, and tell you otherwise. The best way to counteract negativity is with confident knowledge in presenting your case about a job. Know the facts up and down, including the odds you’ll face, the opportunities for growth, the challenges you’ll face, the schooling you might need, how you’ll prepare to pay for costs associated with moving, schooling, traveling, etc. Also be sure you know the success rate, and have a plan for what you’ll need to do in order to succeed.
3. Don’t Let Them Steal Your Thunder
If you’re in an industry your parents don’t approve of, even if it's “beneath” what they feel you should be going for, don't let them steal your thunder, so to speak, about something you’re passionate about. Everyone is given different passions for a reason, and your parents simply might not understad yours, which is where the negativity comes from. Take it with a grain of salt, and so long as you have a plan, are confident in your decision, know the odds you’ll face, and what you know you need to do to succeed, you’ll be just fine! Don’t let someone else, including your parents, steal your joy. When you act like they’re not getting to you, you’re more likely to avoid future negativity from them.
4. Be Mature
One of the most important things to do to avoid negativity from your parents is to be mature when you talk to them about the job you’re in, or that you’re pursuing. Don’t be childish and get mad and stomp away if they make you angry. Be mature in how you handle situations with them. Don’t yell, no matter how angry they might make you, and be confident in your answers to them, while also being mature. Sit down and discuss the situation with them, and handle it with maturity. Your parents will see you as more grown up for doing so, and are less likely to discuss it over and over again with you in the future.
Try to understand where your parents are coming from, even if they upset you, and even if they say something hurtful, wrong, and negative. Know that they feel like they’re supposed to parent you, and supposed to tell you what they think you need to hear about a job they don’t feel is right for you. Some parents have it in their minds that it’s their job to do that. I know mine does. Just because my mom doesn’t understand something, she might say things she doesn’t mean about a certain situation in my life I care about. When I first told her I wanted to be a freelance writer, she told me to keep dreaming. I knew my mom loved me and supported me, yet she didn’t like the “daydreaming” factor of working for myself. She wanted me to do the responsible thing, go to college, get a degree, and get a “regular” job, as she called it. Well, I knew she just wanted the best for me, and that she loved me, so I let it go. Later on, after I got the degree, went to college, etc., guess what? I still ended up being a freelance writer because my passion wouldn’t let it go. All those years, understanding her position on the matter helped me avoid negativity that she brought my way about the issue. Now, she’ll tell you, she’s prouder of me than ever, and I never hear any negativity from her.
6. Prove Them Wrong
That all being said, if you really want to avoid negativity from your parents, prove them wrong! Go out and be successful in the job you want, and you’ll be able to prove your parents wrong better than ever. Do it smart, and don’t quit a job without a new one, but just go for whatever dreams you want to achieve. Above all things, that will show your parents there’s no room or need for negativity.
7. Tell Them You’re Sorry
Lastly, if your parents still can’t be happy for you if you do get the successful job, and have a great career, then tell them you’re sorry they can’t be happy for you, and just move on. Sometimes, that’s the best way to tell them nicely that you’re happy in your job, but that you’re not trying to please them anymore. Do it in a nice way, and be careful how you handle the situation. If you’re over the age of 18, successful in your job, financially independent, and your parents are still negative about your job, then just apologize for the differences you have and move on.
Having a parent be negative about a job you care about isn’t easy, but I hope these ways to handle the situation might help. What things have you learned about how to avoid negativity from your parents about a job?