Every parent has their own method for dealing with their kids’ tantrums. Some parents ignore tantrums and hope they will go away while other parents use corporal punishment. Here are some tips for dealing with tantrums.
1. Don’t Give in
Never give in to a tantrum; otherwise you are sending the message that tantrums are the way to get what you want... which will, of course, only increase the frequency and volume of tantrums!
2. Walk Away
When your child is throwing a tantrum, walk away. Once the child realizes you are not paying attention, they will most likely realize it is not worth the effort to scream and carry on.
3. Create Positive Attention
If you have more than one child your attention will always be in demand by one child or another. Devoting quality time (attention) to each child is likely to eliminate drastic competition for your attention, thus decreasing tantrums for attention's sake.
4. Consequences
Be consistent with administering a consequence each time your child throws a tantrum. For example, take away a privilege like watching a favorite TV show. Once they learn their tantrums have negative consequences, they ought to stop.
5. Hold Them
Contain your child by enveloping them in a hug that physically prevents them from their tantrum. This works wonders with some children, but be warned that it may infuriate others.
6. Listen
Tantrums may indicate your child is trying to tell you something and they perceive you are not listening. If the child will talk civilly, try to determine what the problem is.
7. Consistency
Be consistent in handling tantrums; be sure you are not sending confusing signals. In other words, once you find what works, stick to it.
8. Change Environment
Removing a child from the environment in which they are throwing a tantrum often stops the tantrum. This is especially effective if everyone else is having fun and your child has to be removed to the car or another room where they are not having fun.
9. Make No Apologies
Don’t feel you need to apologize for disciplining your child. Your tantrum-busting is intended to teach the child that if they chose to have a tantrum that consequences will follow; you need not be sorry for teaching your child to behave.
10. Have a Plan
Be ready with an anti-tantrum plan at all times. Never react in anger, always remain calm when dealing with a tantrum.
Our role as parents to is to prepare our children for life. Any opportunity (even a tantrum) can be a learning experience, one intended to mold your child’s attitudes and behavior. What did your mom do if you threw a tantrum?
Top Photo Credit: marzipan inc
Frequently Asked Questions
- What is the best first step when my child starts a tantrum?
- Stay calm and acknowledge their feelings without giving in to demands.
- How can I prevent tantrums before they start?
- Establish routines and give your child plenty of rest and healthy snacks.
- Should I always comfort my child during a tantrum?
- Yes, offer comfort but also set clear boundaries to help them learn self-control.
- Is it effective to ignore a tantrum?
- Ignoring can work if the tantrum is a bid for attention, but ensure your child is safe.
- How long do tantrums usually last?
- Most tantrums last between 2 to 5 minutes, but patience is key during this time.
- Can I distract my child during a tantrum?
- Distraction can sometimes help, especially with younger children, by shifting focus.
- When should I seek professional help for tantrums?
- If tantrums are frequent, intense, or interfere with daily life, consider consulting a pediatrician.
- How can I teach my child to express emotions better?
- Encourage using words and model calm behavior to help them identify and communicate feelings.
- Is it okay to set consequences after a tantrum?
- Yes, gentle and consistent consequences can teach boundaries without escalating the situation.
- How do I manage my own stress during my child's tantrum?
- Take deep breaths, remind yourself this is normal, and practice self-care once things settle.