Are You in Danger of Spoiling Your Kids? ...

Alison

What are the signs you may be spoiling your kids? Every parent wants to do the best for their children, but it's also important to teach them limits and that they can't have everything they want. Otherwise they will grow up to be entitled adults and will still want your money when they're old enough to pay their own way! Here are some warning signs you may be spoiling your kids …

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1

You Never Say No

One of the warning signs you may be spoiling your kids is if they never hear the word 'No' from you. You could be giving them the message that all they have to do is ask (or beg), and they'll get what they want. This will mean that life comes as a shock when they have to pay their own way and find out how expensive everything is.

2

Getting into Debt

Of course you want your kids to have a fantastic Christmas and enjoy their birthday, but there are better ways to do that than spending lots of cash. It's one thing if you can afford to buy lots of presents, but it's not worth getting in to debt. If you have to put their gifts on your credit cards (and spend months paying it off), you're spoiling them too much.

3

You Give in

Do you give in to your kids' demands just to have a quiet life? You're actually making life hard for yourself, as well as spoiling them. Giving in to them is sending the wrong message - all they have to do is keep on at you and they'll get what they want. Think of it as playing a long game - it might be difficult initially, but will pay off in the long term.

4

They Have Too Much

How many toys, games and gadgets do your kids have? If they don't play with most of the things they have, then they probably have too much stuff. It might be time to weed out some of the things they don't play with and donate them to charity, as well as put the brakes on buying anything new.

5

They Whine

Phrases like 'but Mooooooommmmm, all my friends are going …' or 'I really want it' are familiar to every parent. Kids can whine and whine to try to get their way. Giving in teaches them that they can get what they want if they whinge enough. It's not a good lesson for them to learn, and it's an expensive one for you - since you'll be paying for everything.

Famous Quotes

Happiness depends upon ourselves.

Aristotle
6

More than You Have

Are you spending more on your kids' clothes than on your own, and buying them gadgets that even you don't have? This could be a sign that you're spoiling them. They don't need tablets, TVs and laptops each. Learning to share is a good habit, so consider having family gadgets for everyone to share instead.

7

They're Never Happy

Finally, if your kids are never happy with the things they have, whether it's toys and gadgets or trips out, they're definitely getting spoilt. What they really need is your attention, not your money, so show them that they don't need things to be happy and enjoy themselves.

Spoiling your kids may be done with the best of intentions - wanting your children to be happy and to give them the things you never had. But you're making life difficult for yourself, and risking raising a child who think the world owes them. There are so many more important things that they need, which you can't put a value on. Have you ever known anyone who was really spoilt?

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I used to get our kids to check over toys that they had before birthdays and Christmas and select some they could give away to charity and less fortunate children.It teaches kids to share.

It's helpful to have freedom for kids within firm boundaries. I suggest reading the book Bringing Up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman. It's not a parenting book, but it does give some interesting insight.

So what do I do if this sounds like my 4yr.old daughter?? Any suggestions

I was spoilt as a kid and tbh it gets harder as you get older because you always want everything and it's harder to pacify a teen than it is to pacify a baby

There will be a battle the first few times you tell her "no." She will cry, scream, and do anything to get her way. If you remain firm but calm, eventually it will settle and your life will be much calmer. She just needs to learn that her behavior is not acceptable when she doesn't get her way. Don't worry, with time, you will remedy this:)

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