What are some useful tips if your parents are telling you how to raise your kids? Parents often offer well-meaning but unsolicited advice on parenting to their adult children. This can be useful, but may be annoying if you'd rather just raise your kids your own way. Try these tips if your parents are telling you how to raise your kids and you wish they wouldn't …
The first of my tips if your parents are telling you how to raise your kids is to listen to them, even if their advice is driving you nuts. Sometimes it's easier than arguing with them, as they may be offended if you tell them to butt out. You can listen and nod for the sake of politeness, and then carry on doing things your way.
2. Are They Right?
Even if your parents' advice is annoying you, consider if they have a point. After all, they managed to raise you well enough, so they must have some good ideas about parenting. Is it their advice that's annoying you, or is it that they're making you feel like they're telling you you're raising your kids the wrong way?
3. Be Selective
Just because you don't want to follow your mom's advice on parenting to the letter doesn't mean that none of what she says is any good. Be selective and choose which advice you want to follow. Moms usually know quite a lot of useful things that they've learned through experience, so make the most of this resource and pick and choose.
4. They're Your Kids
Ultimately your kids are your responsibility, and if your parents are really annoying you ask them to refrain. Point out that you're the mother of your children and will make all decisions on their welfare and upbringing. Unfortunately this risks antagonising them, as they may take offence.
5. Things Have Changed
Parenting has changed a lot, so what was standard advice when you were young may not be the case any more. Tell your parents that things have changed, and that experts recommend different advice now. Family lifestyles can also be very different from in the past, and if you bring up your kids in a way that works for you, that's your choice. Your parents might not approve, but as long as your kids are well cared for, that's your parents' problem.
6. Ask for Advice
You can also try deflecting the unsolicited advice by actually asking your parents what they think about certain aspects of bringing up children. If they feel that you value their opinion, they may forget to offer advice when you haven't asked for it. They might actually have some useful ideas that you can take advantage of.
7. Reduce Contact
If your parents are really interfering and trying to override your authority, then you may have to limit the contact you and your children have with them. This really is a last resort though and one you'll only want to use if they're making your life difficult.
Parents can be well-meaning when they give parenting advice to their own children, and they're probably not telling you you're doing something wrong. They just want to be helpful. So try not to get too annoyed by it. Do your parents treat you like you've never grown up?